You know what I’ll just skip the ramblings to the end of this post, because 1) I’ll be boring off half of my potential readers and 2) I’m too lazy to even begin writing them tbh. Oh and 3) we have an emergency on our hands and it is that LADY FUCKING GAGA HAS JUST RELEASED HER FIRST POP ALBUM SINCE 2013, A DAY I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR SINCE WELL 2013. All the anticipation has built up to this point, and I can not be more ready. FUN FACT: last year in April, I opened my diary at a random page and marked it down, saying THIS is when I will hear LG5. That day was October 22nd. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a psychic. I honestly, HONESTLY still don’t believe this day has come.
HIT ME WITH ‘EM, GAGA.
In this post, I will be doing a track-by-track review/reaction to Lady Gaga’s newest studio album, Joanne, out October 21st. Its title references Gaga’s middle name, and her late aunt who passed away in 1974 because of lupus after she had been sexually assaulted. This is Gaga’s most stripped back, personal album yet, according to her.
HEEEEERE WE GO! (yes yes I have heard A-YO already.)
iReview: Joanne – Lady Gaga
1- Diamond Heart:
Let’s go omfg
Is this a piano?
YOUNG WILD AMERICAN ALREADY ICONIC
YYYYYAAAAAAAAASSSSSS GOGO’IN go back to those roots Gags
Asshole broke her in? Rape?..
YOUUUUUNG WIL AMERICAAAAAAAAAN I KNEW ITS ICONIC
Wait Diamond Heart isn’t about her engagement ring? Right…
Can we talk about her vocals? Where do you hear vocals like these on any female album these days. SH00K
I always said I hate guitar+drums driven songs but this is FUCKING GOOD
Maybe because it’s Gaga and I’m biased but YES
Amazing way to start the album.
Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa we go
Blow it ur face
Blow it in ur face
Blow it in ur blow it in ur face
This is so FUN. YES.
The beat sounds familiar but in the good way.
WE SMOKIN EM ALL
A.k.a the Chainsmokers who had shit to say about her in the press. What’s good? She ended those rats. Anyway.
You can’t NOT dance to this song! My body is involuntarily shaking.
This is a BOP.
Okay… I did not expect these ‘drumsies’.
Wait where is the piano? THIS IS NOT WHAT I SIGNED UP FOR
Why is this melody so… Uplifting? Her aunt just died.
Girl… Where do you think you’re goin’? (with this melody)
This sounds… Off. It’s a song about her aunt who died… It should feel sadder. It made people cry. Why am I not crying? I’M HERE TO CRY.
The chorus is really beautiful though, no question.
Alright, the more I listen to this song… I get it. The emotion is ‘implicit’. Her vocal delivery was done in one take according to her. I can feel her pain.
I need to give her a hug.
4- John Wayne:
BYE BYE HUG
HELLO JOHN WAYNE (btw notice how it sounds like ‘Joanne’ ‘John Wayne’ is this intentional?)
THAT SCREAMMM YASS MAMA
I DID NOT SEE THAT CHORUS COMING
OH NO OH NO
MY WEAVE IS BEING SNATCHED
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS THE CHORUS AGAIN I STILL HAVENT RECOVERED FROM THE FIRST TIME
Hands down my favorite so far.
I WAS NOT READY FOR THIS BRIDGE
UGHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS FEELS LIKE A MOVIE CLIMAX
I want to scream JOHN WAYNE with her but my parents are sleeping so
Please hire this producer for the entirety of the next album
5- Dancin’ In Circles:
WHAT IS THIS
WHO GAVE YOU PERMISSION TO HIT ME WITH THIS FAME MONSTER THROWBACK??a!?!??qSJHA
This feels like a Sia song. I LOVE A SIA SONG.
The prechorus! Amazing.
YES THE HOOK AGAIN
LET’S FUNK DOWNTOWN
Am I the only one who feels like these songs are going way too fast? Like I DON’T HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO PROCESS THE SLAYAGE
Gaga thank you for this So Happy I Could Die 2.0 yes thanks yes
Vanish as I touch myself? THAT CUTESY VOICE FAMEGA IT IS REALLY YOU
OOOOOOHHHHH THE FUCKING HIGH NOTES AT THE END
This is such a dancey song. I LIVE.
6- Perfect Illusion:
AND HERE COME THE GUITAR RIFFS
One month later and this song is still amazing. Of course you’d know that if I fucking UPDATED MY BLOG THEN but oh well.
IT WASN’T LAAAAAAAAAAAAHV
IT WASN’T LAAAAAAAAAAAAHV
IT WAS A PERFECT ILLUSION
Like some people actually don’t like this.
And now the part with the background vocals that slay the entire universe
IN A MODERN ECSTASY
Her vocals are just UGH. I remember when I heard this the first time when it was released and how amazed I was.
AND HERE COMES THE KEYCHANGE OF THE CENTURYYYYYYYYYY
And my favorite part: *dumdumdumdumdum* IILLLUUSIOOOOOONNNN
Still slays. Ugh.
Another one I have already heard a lot, and memorized.
Can we just appreciate this stripped back Gaga? We all asked for it. She might not be here for long so enjoy ha while she lasts.
The emotion in her voice is breathtaking. And that chorus hits you like one of her 5 vintage cars.
The best thing about this song for me is how I can sing the background vocals with her. I love background vocals. I feel special when I sing them. No I cannot explain this.
Breaks my heart to her her crying out like this. I’LL MEND UR BROKEN HEART MOM
Her fucking voice.
8- Sinners’ Prayer:
Lol sounds like Dangerous Woman is about to start
BUT THIS AINT NO DANGEROUS WOMAN
IT’S A DANGEROUSLY SLAYFUL BASSLINE
YES. I LIVE.
The vibe of this song is so captivating.
THE CHORUS. Can we just appreciate the chorus? WOW. It takes you on a ride in a few seconds. The melody changes from cheerful to somber back to hopeful then again to dark IN A MATTER OF SECONDS.
I am so impressed with this. And some people dismissed it as a ‘country song’.
Man, this album may just make me listen to country.
‘I can carry you but not your ghosts’. Tumblr here we come
YESSSS GO UP THAT OCTAVE
And this BASSLINE AGAIN. YES.
9- Come To Mama:
Okay the title already has me shook.
YES BORN THIS WAY TEAS LYRICSWISE
Wait what jungle? Gags wyd
COME TO MAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
YES THE BACKGROUND VOCALS IN THE CHORUS
Wow. WOW. The lyrics though!
She’s talking about a scientist vs. a believer… The scientist = uses prism in physics. The believer = he believes in Noah’s arc (not really though but okay). But both result in… Rainbows! YES GAGAAAAAAAAA
THIS SONG IS SO MARIAH CAREY
AND I LOVE IT
Wait 3 verses?
THE ONLY PRISONS THAT EXIST ARE ONES WE PUT EACH OTHER IN
TAKE THAT TUMBLR. QUOTE THE SHIT OUT OF IT.
UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HER VOCALS
LOOK WHAT THAT RAINBOW DID
The ending. This IS Mariah Carey ugh YES
IM COMING MAMA
10- Hey Girl (featuring Florence Welsh):
3 SECONDS IN AND IM MOVING LIKE A CHARMED SNAKE
THIS BEAT. THIS BEAAAAAAAT
OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
HER VOCALS ARE AMAZING AS ALWAYS
FIT SO BEAUTIFULLY WITH THIS SONG I CANT IM SHOOK SO SHOOK YESSS SHOOK
Their voices go so well together!
AND THIS FUCKING MELODY IT PUTS ME IN A TRANCE WOW JUST WOW I CANT STOP SWAYING
Personal thank you to Florence who probably is responsible for the amazing harps in this.
Does anyone notice the amazing strange synths in the background?!
Yep in the second chorus they are more than noticeable.
ARE THEY SINGING TOGETHER?!
OH MY GOD FLORENCE’S BACKGROUND VOCALS OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD SHE SOUNDS OTHERWORDLY
This fucking song. The melody. The production. The message. The two FUCKING BADASSES SINGING IT.
THE BACKGROUND FORENCE OH’S ONCE AGAIN AHHHH
11- Angel Down:
And here come the emotions. This is about Trayvon Martin.
Yep. The intro alone is amazing.
WOW HER VOICE. IT SOUNDS LIKE SHE’S WHISPERING MY EAR.
I need a moment. I’m in awe.
Okay. Who produced this? I love you.
The lyrics are so touching. With that production, man I feel like going on a midnight walk and crying.
The chorus is unexpected. The sounds are angelic. This is not your regular ballad. This is much more.
GAGA GOES LANA. I’M SO HERE FOR IT. OOOHOOOHOOOO
OHHH ‘CHAOS’! CHAOS ANGEL! THESE WERE NOT RUMORS! OMG
Wow. What just happened?
The outro… it’s like a broken music box… I love this so fucking much.
WHOW THERE IT JUST ENDED SO ABRUPTLY.
Is it like a metaphor to sudden death?
12- Grigio Girls:
This is the song about her best friend Sonja having cancer… here it goes.
Wait she’s that much older? 12 years? She looks much younger…
Okay… I kind of expected a bigger chorus…
The production sounds like it’s struggling to pick up. A shame. The lyrics are beautiful.
Watch your blues turn gold…
Make it all make sense…
Yep here are the feels.
AWWWWWWW SHE IS SO CUTE IN THAT BRIDGE
YAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSS THE SQUAD IS HEREEEEEEEEEE
Why do they sound like they have swallowed helium?
Lol of course Gaga had to outsing them all.
Okay there’s a laugh at the end that is just creepy as fuck.
13- Just Another Day:
Yes this is the one I heard her sing live on the radio!
BACK TO HER RED AND BLUE ROOTS AND I’M SO SURPRISED I LOVE IT SO MUCH! YES!
This song is just so cute oh my god!
And after all… it’s just another day!
Okay tho but is that like a sax, a guitar, a synth, a dying cockroach…
YESSSSSSS BRIAN’S TRUMPETS SOUND SO GREAT
I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH YAS GAGA VOCALS MAMA
I can just imagine her smiling and singing this in her studio. She’s happy. I’m happy.
14- Angel Down (Work Tape):
Oh, a more stripped down piano/guitar version. I like that! I wish there was one for Joanne.
I confess I like the original better, the production really adds to it.
SHE SOUNDS LITERALLY LIKE THE MOTHER OF ANGELS CRYING OUT FOR HER ANGELS.
When did she record this? She sounds different than how she did the rest of the album… so RAW. So PASSIONATE.
THOSE SCREAMS. I’d rather save an angel down.
And… it’s over.
This was what I call a fucking EXPEDITION.
The opening track couldn’t have set the tone better.
The title track felt anticlimactic at first, but it gets catchier, deeper and more meaningful with each listen.
Then it’s a string off amazing fun bops to dance to before Gaga hits us with the more ‘serious’ stuff.
The world is full of deceptions, things you never knew would turn out to just be illusions.
The world is full of people who will drive you insane, but who you can’t get away from.
The world is full of hatred and ignorance, humans who are destroying each other and themselves over their clash of ideas.
The world is full of women who are willing to step on each other to reach their wants, in a world still ruled by men, instead of helping each other up.
The world is full of innocent people who are dying every single day because of political agendas and inequality.
And we all just stand around.
This album was something I’ve been waiting to hear for eternity. And I’m finally blessed to do so. I’d never have expected something so powerful and deep from Gaga. She outdid herself, she surprised me and many, many others. It’s truly one of the highlights of her career. She has worked so hard to get here, and seeing her finally make the music SHE wants to make, is more than what I could ever ask for.
I’m in love with this music. Thank you, Gaga. Keep doing what you do.
Joanne is extremely proud of you.
Okay, so time for the promised ramblings. I have been beating myself up for not updating my blog for the past few months. The longer it went, the more urgent a ‘comeback’ felt, and the more hard it seemed to be to make. I couldn’t just turn up out of the blue uninvited and I couldn’t stay away like I never said goodbye (yes I know these are not the right lyrics but it had to fit the situation I’m talking about okay?). It had to be something BIG. HUGE. AND LET’S BE HONEST. IT DOESN’T GET HUGER THAN THIS.
I’m truly feeling bad about abandoning this blog with no notice like that. I want to write a second post explaining everything but I just *know* I’ll slack off and not do it. So I’ll try to put it all in here. After I quit my summer job, I spent one AMAZING month, and I was preparing for Blogwarts. Then I got caught up in it, and school started, my FINAL YEAR OF HIGHSCHOOL BEFORE COLLEGE ASDFGHJKL SO YEAH I’m overswamped with work, and that’s apart from extracurricular things like piano lessons and choir practice. Random thought, I really need to start working out tbh, I can’t keep feeling depressed every time I see a naked torso. So yeah.
I WANT TO BE BACK HERE SO BAD I MISS YOU ALL SO FUCKING MUCH. But I’m even slacking off my school work, what about this blog lololololol
Maybe I’ll start slacking off my school work with this blog? I HOPE SO! At least that’d be productive.
Okay, Goodnight! I have to listen to Mariah Carey’s earlier stuff, man where have I been she slayz. BuhByE