I hate the boys in my hometown and there’s nothing you can do about it

I just do, alright?

They seem so douchy and full of themselves. At least the ones I know of.

My parents desperately want me to  ‘make friends with them’, ‘ join their ranks’, ‘trade friendship bracelets’, etc. but I just don’t see myself mingling with such a crowd.

They think I’m being conceited (and maybe I am just a little bit) but I just can’t be friends with everyone, especially not with people who have probably never read more than a few pages lines words in a book (voluntarily), or heard a Lady Gaga song, or know what Harry Potter is (if you’re wondering, yes, those are my standards. All of my friends pretty much qualify, except for one, and that’s why I’m considering cutting him loose).

They’re too primal for my taste. All they know is how to kick a ball. That seems to be their sole purpose in life. And I hate the way they treat girls. Have they looked in the mirror? Or do they think all mirrors are moving gorilla portraits? No idea.

And while I like to think I’m intellectually superior to the lot of them combined and that I’ll probably end up with a badass job and a superflyingmegacar and a unicorn farm in the future while they’re off feeding the unicorns in my farm, I also really, desperately wish I was one of them.

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Just say it already!

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